Opening Night

This is it. The moment of reckoning has finally arrived.

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Shit.

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Our dress rehearsal last night was a total travesty and I have the feeling that tonight will go similarly. Thankfully my humiliation will be noticed only by strangers this weekend because I know no attendees at the shows in the coming days.

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In other news, I applied for my dream job and got a rejection email on Wednesday morning…

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Also I have been officially diagnosed with something I’ve been aware I had for several years now. So my wrist is all strapped up and I’m on anti inflammatory drugs to quell the RSI that is making dancing a tad difficult.

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I remember when I used to be a happy, enthusiastic person. Those were the good old days. Now I’m just a bitter, angry shell of a human.

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I can’t WAIT until the show is over and I can get back to not being angry and/or tired every minute of every day.

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It has been awfully dramatic this past week, however. We had one cast member escorted off the property by security twice in two days. Let’s call him Michael. He was kicked out of the show for refusing to wear his costume…it was a black t-shirt. Michael thought it looked boring. He believed it would look better if he covered his wrists, knees, head and nose with duct tape instead.

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That’s not a joke. Michael claimed that he saw something similar in the film version but if that were the case, I would have enjoyed watching that movie a lot more. It supposedly made him look rugged and fresh from a flight with a Jet.

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He seriously did that. Even his knees.

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Yup.

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Michael also believed that Jets and Sharks were deadly enemies off stage as well as on, which made for a few awkward conversations/arguments in the communal dressing room.

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And we have another cast member (nicknamed Rolf Harris) who inappropriately touches the girls in the show. Thankfully he hates my guts which means I don’t have to be sexually harassed anytime soon…

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I overheard him bitching about me backstage…while I was 1 meter away changing my shoes, so I had to politely inform him that I would leave the room forthwith in order for him to have privacy for his discussion. It would have been rude not to allow him the opportunity to say things about me behind my back. Everyone else in the cast talks about him behind his back. Fair is fair.

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Obama is proud of me? Wow, thanks Obama. Let’s high five.

Awesome.

OK I’d better try and have a nap so I can be fully awake for my pending humiliation. I might need a few shots this afternoon as well.

Wish me luck. And let’s hope I don’t actually break a leg. Or maybe that would be a blessing in disguise…

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4 thoughts on “Opening Night

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