Yeah, so today was boring…
I might have maybe, slightly flooded my WHOLE FUCKING APARTMENT!
I was having a shower and when I got out I stepped into a puddle…
… a puddle that covered every room of my apartment except (thankfully) the living room and my housemate’s bedroom.
So then I was running around like a (naked) headless chicken, throwing towels around like a crazed bathroom attendant.
Yeah. So that happened.
I was meant to have a nice leisurely morning, hanging out in bed and dozing, before heading into the city for a lunch date with a friend but OH NO!
Then the guy I’m seeing, who had spent all afternoon helping me clean my apartment, got a ticket for parking his car in front of said apartment.
Cherry on the motherfucking cake.
I must admit, I’ve never before been worried about a Friday the 13th. However, based on how today has gone, I’m a little nervous that tomorrow will be even more of a shit storm.
Please, please, please, let Friday the 13th not be as bad as people anticipate. PLEASE!
Well, I guess I’d better prepare myself mentally by sleeping as much as I can tonight. At least that way I’ll be awake enough to deal with whatever shit the world can throw at me.
And you know what’s gonna follow Friday the 13th?
Anyone got the answer?
The day of a thousand orgasms for Hallmark and Cadbury.
FUCK YOU V-DAY.
I’ll just wait till the 15th to buy my chocolate. On sale, motherfuckers because that’s how I roll.
This year, however, I have plans.
Legit. Fucking. Plans.
My way of celebrating a day of romance and love is by doing one of those escape room things. Someone locks you and several others in a ‘haunted’ room for an hour with a torch and you have to solve puzzles to get out ALIVE. Or they just let you out after the hour is up. Either one of those.
So you guys can have your hearts and flowers and I’ll be nailing V-Day like a motherfucking boss.
And on that note: sleepytime.